I'm not a very good "waiter". Not in the service sort of way (I was freaking awesome waitress), but in the sit and wait for something kind of way.
It’s not just waiting for something for me, it’s just waiting.
From Christmas gifts to taking a test. I just want to see the outcome.
My husband can tell you...it’s a pain to deal with me around Christmas. If I buy a gift I want you to open it NOW...now in 5 days when it’s actually Christmas. Every year I beg Justin to open his gift early. Every year he says no.
So admittedly I wasn’t ready for this waiting thing for Surrogacy.
I was ok waiting when I had no “options”. When I had no potential parents out there interested in me. I was ok waiting. Because there was no outcome.
But not now.
Now that I have a couple that wants to use me IF something occurs. That drives me crazy.
Now that I have another couple that wants to use me but they aren’t far enough in the process to actually do it yet.
I don’t like waiting.
But this time it’s because I want to get started.
This time it’s because I’m excited to help somebody have a baby.
I’m impatient because I so desperately want to give them this. I want to walk through this with them as we see the pregnancy come back positive. As we look at the first ultra sound or hear the first heartbeat. I’m excited to walk this journey with them and experience their highs and lows right along with them.
I know this is going to be a life changing experience for me and I’m ready for the change to start. I’m ready to see how we’ll all end up.
So if you want to be crazy right along with me pray that the “IF” happens. And talk to me if you want more of the awkward details.