Family Life (82) Surrogacy (66) Rachael (44) So Sayith... (23) Justin (17) Jordan (16) Taylor (14) Elijah (7) Nerdness (3) Adoption (2)

Wednesday, August 24, 2016

Anyone Know a Lawyer?

Every 2-3 weeks for the last 3-4 months the following has occurred:

  • Get a notice from my apartment complex saying they will be spraying for pests so I must “prep” my apartment – attached is a list of how to prep based on the pest being sprayed for.
  • I call the office to figure out what “prep” needs to be done since the notice doesn’t tell you what pest they are spraying for
  • They don’t know so they tell me to do everything
  • I do “everything” which takes 4-5 hours (empty kitchen completely and put everything in living room/dining room table, empty bathroom, empty all closets)
  • I get these notices late on a weekday and so that means I have to do all of this the following weekday (at night) which means I have to do it after work which means I am getting in bed around midnight and getting up at 6AM.
  • That whole night (and the day they spray) the living room and dining room are unusable because they are full of stuff.  The kitchen is also unusable because we can’t dirty any dishes since we can’t wash them because everything is “packed up”. This means we have to eat out 2-3 meals which costs us unnecessary money.
  • Their window for spraying is 9AM-3PM and we can’t return for “4 hours” after they spray.  They don’t tell you when they spray so you don’t know when you can return.
  • ALSO since we have to be gone when they spray and for 4 hours after we have to find something to do all day.  During the summer this meant Justin couldn’t do homework for an entire day AND that he had to somehow entertain kids for an entire day.  During the school year this means again – Justin can’t do homework and neither can the kids (well not easily).
  • The next day I have to put everything back (3-4 hours)
  • Repeat every 2-3 weeks.

If I fail to do any of this I am in lease violation and get a write up.  HOW IS THIS REASONABLE? HOW IS THIS OK? How can they keep doing this and costing me hours of work, costing us money (since we can’t be at home or use our home for 2 days), making Justin miss homework, and making me miss work getting this all done so often?  If “pests” are that big of an issue shouldn’t they be paying to move us somewhere temporarily while they address it?  Why should I have to pay for somebody else’s problem?  OH I forgot to mention…they aren’t even spraying our apartment because we reported an issue… the “pest” issue is some other apartment…

I understand this happening on occasion.  But at what point, at what frequency is it "too much"!

Friday, August 12, 2016

The Boy Named Nico

I dropped Taylor off today at CF Dance Academy and headed to the stairs to sit and wait for her to finish.  At the half way point was a young boy dancing about.

Me: Do you mind if I sit here to?
Boy: Sure! (a huge smile spread across his face)

I sat down and took out my dinner and began to eat.

Boy: Is that your food?
Me: Yup.  Did you eat dinner already?
Boy: No
Me: How long before you leave (I assumed he was also waiting for somebody to finish a dance class)
Boy: I don't know, what time is it?
Me: 5:45
Boy: Oh (I could tell the time actual meant nothing to him)

The boy sat looking at his hands and fidgeting next to me.

Me: So do you dance?
Boy: Yes! (his eyes lit up) I do ballet, jazz, and hip hop!
Me: That's cool, what's your favorite?
Boy: Ballet
Me: How long have you been dancing?
Boy: What month is it? (doesn't give me time to answer and instead begins counting on his fingers)
Boy: 7 (I have no idea if that is weeks, days, months, years, or the age he began)
Boy: I don't live here you know
Me; Oh? Where are you from
Boy: Oregon.  I come here every summer to visit my dad, but I only see him on weekends.  The rest of the time I'm with my cousins.  Dylan's a bully.  He started punching me for no reason.  I miss Oregon.  We have rain there!  And we get do do neat things.
Me; What kind of neat things?
Boy: Like play in sheds.
Me: That sounds cool.
Boy: Yeah!  I miss it there.  I have lots of pets.
Me: How old are you?
Boy: I'm 8 and I turn on 9 on December 19th.
Me: My daughter is 9, that's who I'm waiting for. Who are you waiting for
Boy: Dylan, he's the bully.
Me; What makes him a bully?
Boy: He just gets mad and mean all the time
Me; I'm sorry. Is there anything you like in California?
Boy: My dad. I like when I see him on weekends.  He's fun.  He takes me to the movies.
Me: What's your name?
Boy: Nico.  My friends call me Nico.  My real name is Nicodemus.
Me; That's a really cool name.
Nico: I think it sounds like a fish.

An older man who was sitting at the bottom of the stairs the whole time playing Pokemon Go stood up and walked passed us.

Nico: Oh, I gotta go.
Me: Nice to meet you Nico
Nico: That's my grandpa.

I had no idea the man at the bottom of the stairs who never once looked up at us was actually there WITH Nico.  And for some reason I was just sad for this young boy named Nico.  He spends summer away from his mom, in a place he hates, with family that is mean to him, and during our 30 minute chat I could tell he just craved attention.  Obviously this is just a summary of the conversation (which involved all his pets names, stories about Oregon flooding, how CA beaches don't get waves, and how he knows his dog can open doors because while he slept his tablet magically fell and cracked so it must be the dog).

I know this is random story, but this little boy has been on my mind since I left so I figured I'd share the story of the time I met a boy named Nico.

Friday, July 22, 2016

1 of 11

See what I did there?? I covered my mistake(s) in the countdown by starting to count up! I'm a genius! A genius who can't count or look at a calendar.

I will not being doing count UP lists.  That seems a bit much. I'm sure a count down was a bit much, but you are still reading so it was probably worth it.

So today's "fact"? Today's story? Actually, it isn't for you! It's for my husband, but you are welcome to read it because I love him and you should all know it.

Hey Fat Face,

I had my dream man all pictured by the time I was 16.  I was very wise at 16 and had a great list of dos & donts, of haves & have nots, and of wills and will nots.  Important things like he would have blonde hair, blue eyes, and NO chest hair (I would have added back hair, but I didn't know that was a thing).  Then there was you.  This funny guy that stood next to me in choir.  The guy who would elbow me to make me laugh when trying to hold a note.  The guy I accidentally felt up trying to be funny like him and "tap his leg" when trying to hold a note. 

The first day I saw you upset because of girl (a friend of mine no less) and we spent the ENTIRE bus ride to LA talking and becoming friends.  I didn't realize then that my brain was forming a new "man of dreams".  Maybe it was all flirting, but your compassion and heart during that time were amazing to me.  You went out of your way for me and you barely knew me.  You made me laugh - the kind of laughing that made my cheeks and belly sore.  It didn't hurt that you had the cutest dimples that accompanied your mischievous smile.

Eventually I realized that I wanted to be more than a friend (it took me awhile).  But once I realized it, I was certain you were "it" for me.  In 10 years we've made a LOT of mistakes - we do not fight well.  However, in 10 years we've learned from almost all of those mistakes.  We've grown.  Our relationship has morphed into something awesome.  Somebody even asked us to give marriage advice because we had a "good marriage", how did that happen??

You put up with my stubbornness and need to control everything.  You calm me down when I stress over absolutely nothing.  You never have to say it, and you may not even realize you are doing it, but you constantly help me to step back and remember that the only peace and joy in this world comes from God.  I am the wife, mother, and child of God I am today because of your awesome leadership and compassion.  I know I am NOT an easy woman to "lead", so thank you.

I know this year has sucked for you in a lot of ways.  I hope I show/tell you enough that all the sucky stuff that could leave you feeling defeated don't define you.  I know that's tacky, but I said it so deal with it.  I also meant it.  You are awesome.  I love you.  I wouldn't want to go through life with anyone else (for realsies - you know I couldn't remarry so don't die).


PS You may not have made me cry on our wedding day - but writing this blog totally made me cry.  I am so stupid blessed to have you even if sometimes I want to throw a shoe at your face.

Thursday, July 21, 2016

2 to 10

Let's keep it real.  I thought of doing this countdown when I thought I was a day behind and I actual anniversary can be day "1" right?  Sure it can! I'm making this up as I go.  The problem is I've been calling it 6 to 10...4 to 10.. so on our anniversary (a mere hour away) it would be 1 to 10 an that makes no sense.  But it's 11.  I'm tired.  Justin's grumpy. And the kids are STILL up talking.  So I'll think of some way to make it all seem like it was planned correctly tomorrow.  So the list of 2 (is that still a list?)

The most memorable moment from our wedding day:
  1. Justin: Leading up to our wedding I knew I wanted to sing a song to Raych (probably because I apparently like music and stuff), and I knew it would be a Tyrone Wells song because we both think he's awesome plus he has a lot of great songs that would fit. So I went back and forth (not for too long though) and ended up picking "looking at her face" cause it fit, it was a beautiful song... it was just perfect. So I got it all ready and had this cool plan to surprise her before our first dance and it all went to great. She was brought to the middle of the dance floor and sat in a chair, confused out of her mind, and I started playing just as I entered the room (I think David Hart got my guitar ready for me). I think my voice only cracked once and my cheeks started hurting cause I was smiling so much. I'd never really had a "song" with anyone before but that is now it. However, with all that said, the one thing I will never forget about this moment is how every other women, every single female in the room, started crying EXCEPT Raych. Apparently everyone else was more excited.
  2. Rachael: There are actually many, but the first one is oddly related to Sam (who was the best man).  Because like a normal we were doing our vows I may have stopped listening to the pastor at some point.  And while staring into nothingness I caught a glimpse of Sam and naturally winked at him all flirty like.  I was NOT flirting, it just happened.  So there you have it.  I flirted with best man OVER my soon-to-be husband's shoulder during the pastor's speechy thingy.  And then there was that awkward moment that when our first dance was supposed to start Justin put a chair in the middle of the room and made me sit on it...then he came out with a guitar and sang me an amazing song then we finished by dancing to that song.  It was awesome, although he was disappointed he didn't make me cry.



Wednesday, July 20, 2016

4 and 3 to 10

So this one time I thought it was the 13th, but it was actually the 14th which meant this totally awesome countdown was a day off.  I don't know what kind of loser makes that mistake.  But let's all feel bad for her and say, you're life's crazy...we get it... Group Hug!

And because lists are awesome she didn't want to skip a day so you get 2 for the price of one...well more like 7 for the price of 1...or something like that.  So here you go:

4 to 10: The four best dates ever

  1. The night we first hung out - the story deserves it's own blog...and it has one! Read it - you'll love it especially if you love sappy little stories.
  2. The time he surprised me at work (as mentioned in an early list this week).  He took me to the beach (because unlike him I find the beach awesome) and we had dinner at a beach view restaurant. Actually the picture below from 2009 was from that date.
  3. That time we saw Wicked.  It was amazing and probably the best musical I've seen.  I want to see it again 10 times and them make a blog counting down the 10 days until I see it for my 10th time.
  4. When he surprised me and took me to see Newsies.  Sadly the play was just OK.  It was good, but the changed some things that didn't' need to be changed.  The best part of that night was actually on our way out we saw Taylor Williamson chilling in the back and we talked to him, and took a picture, and he made a video for our kids.  AWESOME

3 to 10: The 3 worst dates ever
  1. For my 21st birthday he took me to Macaroni Grill. They usually have some opera singer or something sing to you, but she/he was not there that night.  Then as soon as we got to the car I puked in the bushes... this was pre-marriage (and he still married me!)  I am likely one of the few people that can say "I puked my brains out on my 21st birthday...and I didn't have a single drink of alcohol to make this occur"
  2. Actually...also the night we first hung out...AFTER the cute hang out thing he decided 2 AM was good time to take me to his mom's house, wake her up, and introduce us.  Thank the Lord she doesn't recall this first meeting.
  3. The time we thought it was a good idea to see a movie called "40 Year Old Virgin" we neglected any rational thought on that one.  Why would it be a descent "clean" movie.  That was a bad life choice (although funny)



Tuesday, July 19, 2016

5 to 10

Because he has been able to work his butt off today and get homework done he is getting to do 5 awesome things about me.  I like that :)

  1. She takes care of me like nobody's business. Pushed me to get back into school and looked through options (granted this is one of the things she loves to do anyways but still), now while I'm in school she has taken on a lot of the house work, (probably more than necessary) so that I can get my work done and not go insane, she helps me watch my diet even though I hate it, it should be happening and she makes good food. 
  2. She likes video games (a lot of them at least) But I do have to let her play first or else she won't play them herself lol, and she enjoys watching me play some games. Like I mentioned before though shooters and MOBAs are not her cup of tea so that stinks since those can be crazy addicting when they're good haha.
  3. She doesn't hold a grudge. Granted, I'm sure a lot of females don't hold to the grudgy (that will be a word now) stereotype, but either way she does not and I love her lack of bitterness. Even beyond this she pays me more respect then I'm sure that I'm due.
  4. She actually finds me impressive at times. I don't know how but I've heard her say it, and she was being serious! She has always been super encouraging and supportive which blows me away, especially since anyone who knows me has seen how I rock that line between mediocrity and "hey, he's not so bad". Seriously though, she keeps me goin.
  5. Most important of all, she puts up with my all of my nonsense. Whether it be the truly idiotic, classic failure as a husband kind, or my goofing around cause it's hilarious side (yes, always hilarious, one day she'll appreciate all of it). We are always able to work things out AND she does actually laugh at me more than she would care to admit. I honestly highly doubt that any other women would have been able to make this marriage as awesome as she has. And that's just plain fact so I don't need your comparison.


Monday, July 18, 2016

6 to 10

Now you've had things that drive us crazy about each other.  You've had things interesting we've learned about each other.  And you've had awesome things about Justin.  And since Justin is swamped with homework today I'm improvising with a new list.  Today's list is a list of weird couple things we do.

  1. When one of us says "now" the other must respond by saying exactly what's on his/her mind in that moment.
  2. Because we understand each other and our crazy since of humor we can get away with the following.  I'm sure this would end most relationships.  We "love" each other by being overly (and jokingly) rude to each other.  This quite frequently includes things like "You're so dumb", "Nobody likes you anyway", and "I hate your face".  My coworkers know I'm talking to him on the phone, not because I say "I love you", but because I call him smelly or lame.
  3. If you see us holding hands you may notice our thumbs wiggling around.  There is no need to be alarmed.  This is just our thumbs making out.
  4. A threat of "fine, just sleep on the couch" results in a very happy husband who translates that to mean "fine, just stay up all night playing video games.  I feel the need to say I have never actually used that threat and meant it - it is just said in line with #2.
  5. I do not like to spend money, but when I decide to do it I make big purchases without thinking.  "Justin, I think we need a TV. Let's go NOW!"  Justin is much more thoughtful when it comes to large purchases and has talked me out of many, but he is much more likely to make many small purchases.
  6. We will usually gladly get something for each other like, "can you grab a cup of water for me?"  However, we will often be very UNlikely to do it if we are sitting down already.  This typically results in one of us yelling, "WAIT DON'T SIT DOWN" right before somebody sits.  It's usually me doing the yelling.

Sunday, July 17, 2016

7 to 10

So today's list will be all about how awesome my husband is.  I mean, I tell you all often how great he is, but what better way to do that AGAIN then with a list of awesome things my husband DOES or HAS DONE.

  1. Early in our relationship there was this issue with distance.  He lived in the OC and I lived in Riverside/San Bernadino County - not a fun commute.  One day while doing my closing shift a handsome young man walked in with a single rose tied with a teal ribbon.
  2. Once I got a phone call from Sam (because Sam and I worked together at the time) and Sam said "Good you are at your desk. Don't move."  I was confused, but instead of going to lunch I sat and waited for Sam to come to my desk.  Instead I was greeted by Sam with my husband (single rose in hand).  Justin had called my bosses and planned an afternoon off for my birthday.
  3. 9 times out of 10 if I'm sitting with my feet in his lap he will massage them.  It's fantastic.
  4. If I am in arms reach then he is touching me.  Nothing quite makes a woman feel loved then feeling like her husband can't keep his hands off of her.  Holding my hand, arm around my shoulder, or arm around my waist.
  5. He has impeccable aim.  I should clarify.  When peeing he has impeccable aim.  I rarely find a stray drop of urine (unless Elijah's been using my toilet).  HOWEVER, he vomits so infrequently that when he does do it he does so violently and explosively.  It is messy.
  6. When we played WOW (World of Warcraft) I never had time to do dailies.  He would log on to both our accounts and do them for both of us.  If you've never played WOW you don't understand how awesome this is.  It is very awesome.
  7. If it involves mold or curdled milk he handles it.  If you missed yesterday's blog read it now so you can fully understand that this is probably the most awesome thing he does.

Saturday, July 16, 2016

8 to 10

I am handing the blog over to Justin for tonight so he can create his list of 8 things he's learned about me over the years.  I'd say "enjoy", but who knows what you are about to get.

  1. That spread sheets are not only fun, but a satisfying way to spend her day. Seriously if you have something you want put through excel you will make her happy, kinda like if you had just given me free chocolate shakes for the day, or a day of video gaming.
  2. This ties into the kind of video games she likes playing. They either have to have a strong story, or mindless task mastering. I'd say that this combination is what got her to like World of Warcraft but she actually never read any of their story elements ...... It is nice having a wife that likes games though
  3. She has very strange eating habits, she has a thing for textures which isn't too rare, but she also hates pork unless it is in the form of bacon (sucks to be her right?). Even more surprising is that she will not eat chicken that she has cooked. Why will she not eat Cheee-kan (5th element reference that she loves) that she has cooked? this is a great wonder great minds have not been able to understand. Also, I don't think she likes it on the bone in general.
  4. She also doesn't "prefer" chocolate. She'll claim that she hates it, but the problem with this is that she will occasionally have chocolate, like a brownie for instance (that I could have eaten). Or when she eats a snickers she eats the chocolate off first to save the best for last. Eats it, does not scrape it off for my chocolate-loving-self, but eats it. Therefore she does not "hate" chocolate, instead she does not "prefer" it.
  5. Speaking of things that she finds distasteful. I have found that she will gag and the thought of anything that is gross. Mold or old milk for instance will make her gag at the mere thought (she probably just gagged while reading this). Especially if you talk about touching it like saying "man wouldn't you love to run mold all over your hands like you were washing in it?", or "I just squeezed that old milk and it was squishing right through my fingers, i think I got some in my mouth." (I know she gagged right after this). These are disgusting things, don't get me wrong, but most people don't visibly gag at them lol. One that is not as usual is the idea of a pill touching the tongue (she hates when I dry swallow them), or the thought of someone eating margarine by itself. This is something I did as a kid and now our kids do it. the problem is I find these reactions fascinating and hilarious and the kids do as well. poor Rachael.
  6. I've found that I can be pretty "mean" when I talk to her (playing around of coarse) but if I call her "woman" she will give me a look and get quiet, which I think means she's contemplating whether or not I need to be alive anymore. It has gotten to the point that most people who are close to us know who's on the phone when I answer in a crafty, hilarious comment that would seem mean in a normal situation. If you ever hear me answer the phone in this way it mean you have reached a privileged family friend status because you understand. (disclaimer: I do not recommend this as a great way to be a couple, I have to be extra loving to show how fake my meanness is :P)
  7. Pre-marriage I found out that she did not like her face wet, which would cause her to flip out, somewhat violently, if this happened. Later I even found out that the thought of this, as well, will drive her insane although not as horribly as the previously noted. This means that I had countless hours of fun via a quick wet hand to her forehead or cheek. Wet via licking my hand or Ice made no difference. So if your face is ever wet while around her and you don't dry it off you may get her to start squirming. This needs to happen in a place where it shouldn't be wet (for instance a pool or shower is off limits), and is heightened if you have dried off the rest of your body except your face (I bet she just squirmed again).
  8. She is probably one of the most thoughtful, understanding, and caring people I know, which is why I'm probably able to get away with messing with her like I do. She will take care of you when you need it, and if she knows you're struggling she'll be on her game to get you through it (as long as it doesn't involve heavy socializing). She puts up with me even when it's not messing around and I'm just being a complete inept fool. She will understand how I'm screwing up, and attempt to be patient with me as I get through it, all the while taking care of me (as long as she has calmed down 🙂. She is awesome and beautiful inside and out, and I'm not sure how I lucked out in getting to spend my life with her (although I think following up a crappy boyfriend helped 🙂 ). I could probably go on more about the fun and awesome things I've learned about my all so interesting wife but I've been told this is the magic number for this evening thanks to her count down'ish thing she is doing.


Friday, July 15, 2016

9 to 10

For today's countdown list you will get 9 things I have learned about Justin in the last 10 years - and stories to go with (as applicable).

  1. It's 9 things about Justin because his favorite number is 9.
  2. He talks and interacts with me in his sleep.  My favorite was the time he woke me up by grabbing both of my shoulders and licking up my back. Drool dripping from chin he smiled and said, "mmm, ice cream".  I punched his shoulder and he looked at me confused.  I asked him why he licked me and he sleepily said, "I didn't!"
  3. He smells things.  What is that? I don't know...let me smell it! Like finding a red goopy puddle in the Youth room after a sleep over.  He ponders...what is it? His solution...stick my finger in it and smell it (it was flaming hot Cheetos vomit by the way)
  4. His mouth is an echo chamber.  He is maybe the only person alive that can make eating string cheese loud.
  5. He laughs at himself before he says something funny (or at least that he thinks is funny).  I know he is about to make some sort of witty comment because I hear a small chuckle as warning.
  6. In order to poop he takes off everything from waist down.  I do not understand the need to get nearly naked to poop.  This is an oddity he and his best friend have in common.
  7. He is a very patient man...unless you are driving anywhere near him.  Then he hates you and thinks you are abomination. 
  8. He has an epic sweet tooth.  He can never say no to a brownie, chocolate chip cookie, or a coke.
  9. A perfect day for him is a day with friends playing games (board or video).

Thursday, July 14, 2016

10 to 10

So in 10 days we will be celebrating our 10th anniversary! And you all know I like count downs.  So today you get 10 things that drive us crazy about each other.

Justin about Rachael

  1. Impatience (I spent the last 2 minutes telling him to hurry and answer - he didn't like the last sentence so we are adding...) I'm talking about how when you are ready to leave somewhere you want to leave right now.
  2. Worisomeness
  3. Insecurity, can't give you compliments (I just assume he wants something)
  4. You never want to eat out, you always want to come home
  5. That you wont play some games with me (I HATE click to move and FPS)

Rachael about Justin

  1. He doesn't close the shower curtain after his shower
  2. He is very easily distracted
  3. He's a midnight muncher
  4. He responds to my questions when he's asleep so I think he's awake, but he has no recollection of the interaction
  5. He's a sleep groper so he wakes me up and then once I'm up he falls back asleep and get's angry at me if I try to wake him back up.


Monday, July 11, 2016

The Bloody Truth

This is the disclaimer.  This blog will have bloody details.  This blog will talk about things many may not ever want to know about me.

You’ve been warned.

SOoOoOoooo… 10 months ago exactly while vomiting my breakfast into my hospital room toilet I felt a liquid gush from my lady bits.  I assumed, because of the commonality of it, that I had peed on myself.  However, it was actually amniotic fluid because my cervix was a pansy and couldn’t handle the weight of the twin babies.  

So 10 months ago I got sliced open and my innards were moved about and children were pulled out.

7 months ago I had my first post-delivery period.  It was a lot rougher than I remembered.  By rougher I mean just a pain to deal with.  I felt like I was bleeding buckets.  I was quite positive I would die of severe blood loss in my sleep (that is slight sarcasm – I was actually quite positive I would not die).

6 months ago it was even worse!  I had driven to church to hang out with our youth for the eve and when standing talking a clot the size of grape fell into my shoe! GROSS!!! (I warned you).  I got home and had blood everywhere.  I was grateful for black pants and something to sit on in the car.  To make it clear.  I was wearing both insertable and stick on protection and bled through both in a matter of 2 hours. Fun.

And for months it has continued.  I’d thought I’d grown out of the awkward phase of checking your rear end every few hours as you leave the bathroom “just in case”.   It wasn’t the bleeding so much as the clots.  I’ve had periods before (although never as heavy as needed to change things every 1-2 hours for 1-2 days).  I could handle the bleeding – it just means frequent bathroom breaks and rear end mirror checks.

It’s the flipping clotting!  They aren’t big clots, but they are big enough that the protective barriers can’t hold them so they take a road trip…down my leg… and most frequently into my shoe.

I’ve missed church because of the chance of the awkward conversation of – don’t mind the blob of blood on the floor – I’ve been told it’s perfectly normal.

I’ve missed work (that was a fun conversation to have with my male boss – hey sometimes I can’t control the amount of oozing my body does so it’s “safer” if I work at home sometimes so the embarrassing things happen in the privacy of my home instead of at work).  UGH! Who does that! Who has to miss work because they can’t control a stupid period! It’s aggravating.  I don’t want to be the type of lady who can’t keep her stupid period under control – it’s been 15 years or so (I have no idea when I started) I should know how to handle this.

But, sometimes we have no control over things our body decides to do.  

So, when I miss church – know I’ll be there next week.

So, when I miss work – know you can still find me working online from home.

So, when I run away unexpectantly to the bathroom – know I sneezed too hard and peed on myself because 5 pregnancies means you pee when you sneeze, cough, or jump on a trampoline/bounce house.  AND maybe I have a blood clot in my shoe.