I have been alive for 29 years. Well nearly 29 years. I’m pretty sure I was born in the evening
sometime.
And really I’ve been alive for 29 years and about 9 months
(give or take). We should celebrate
birthdays at conception “Happy Day Your Mom and Dad Got It On”… I guess that
doesn’t work… but I may begin torturing my kids in that way once they hit
puberty ::insert evil smile::
So to celebrate my 29th year of life I will tell
you 29 facts about me. Some of you know
them all…some of you know some of them…some of you know none of them…
1.
When I experience true road rage I yell at the
evil car “You Butt Wipe”…I know… I’m horrible
2.
The more kids you have the less you can control
your bladder. I don’t just walk around
peeing on myself, but if I don’t “brace” myself before a sneeze or cough I will
pee a little… this has happened in the last week
3.
IF Drew Barrymore, Sylvester Stallone, Drew
Carrey, Louis Anderson, Gilbert Gottfried, Salma Hayek, and Sofia Vergara got
in a boat and disappeared into the Bermuda Triangle…I’d be ok with that
4.
I bit my nails (both fingers and toes) until my
freshman year of high school when a girl looked at my feet and told me I was
not allowed to wear sandals without painted nails – so I stopped biting and
started painting
5.
I cut (or bite) off the chocolate from all the
sides and bottom of a snickers before I eat it.
Because chocolate is gross
6.
I think Kraft Mac N Cheese is the best – if Mac
N Cheese is made with real cheese its gross
7.
I have an addiction to nachos – again…if it is
made with real cheese though it is gross
8.
I have a bald spot on the shin of each of my legs (always
been there)… it probably means I have some kind of rare disease that will kill
me abruptly one day… but it also means I never have to worry about shaving that
spot
9.
Since I’ve only been wearing pants or dresses
with boots my legs are currently only shaved from mid-thigh to mid-shin… it has
been that way for about a month
10.
Sometimes I cough so hard I gag… that can’t be
normal
11.
I have 2 toe nails that grow in a funny direction
(so does Eli..poor kid got it from me)
12.
I haven’t ridden a bike in 18 years… I may not
remember how
13.
Most all breakfast foods are gross… I’d prefer
to eat dinner 3 meals a day
14.
If I cook chicken I can’t eat it…if you cook chicken I can eat it…if chicken is on a bone I won’t eat it
15.
I like the flavor of most all fruits, but will
not eat most of them because of their horrible texture (blueberries, raspberry,
cranberry, banana, kiwi, peaches, and Apricots are out)
16.
I may have eaten so many baby carrots in one
sitting I pooped orange…this may have happened more than once
17.
When I was younger I would take an entire head
of iceberg lettuce and just eat it like a giant apple
18.
I am so not-flexible I cannot sit with my legs
straight in front of me so my body is at a 90 degree angle without feeling the
muscle pull/stretch in just my left leg
19.
I’m an obsessive budgeter and saver and would
rather take any cash I get as gifts and put it into a savings account than buy
something I want (if I NEED it than its fine)
20.
I do however love splurging on things for my
friends and family and when I decide to get something “big” I want it now…not
tomorrow…let’s go shopping today!
21.
I can’t get rid of clothes…I have many a shirt
in my closet I haven’t worn in years (because it doesn’t fit or because it has
a hole that “I’ll fix someday”, or that is just hideous) and I can’t throw it
out. Unlike my husband though…I don’t
wear those shirts in public
22.
I got picked on A LOT in school…I was white
(when 80% were Hispanic), I was smart (when other kids barely showed up to
class), and I was quiet and awkward
23.
I like the tingly feeling of a foot/hand that
fell asleep
24.
If I’m playing a video game with “collections”
or “achievements” I must have every single one
25.
I nearly always have a bruise on my knee or leg
that I don’t know the source of. I
assume it’s Justin kicking me in my sleep.
26.
I rarely ever throw away gum…I usually always
swallow it
27.
If I’m watching a tv show that has a main
character that has something “off” about their face…it is very difficult to
watch. Like Dick Butkis in “The
Neighbors” or Alice and the Red Queen from “Once Upon a Time in Wonderland”
28.
Vomit makes me Vomit. So it may be true that recently while driving
home Jordan began puking in the back seat of the car and I had my head out the
window (in the rain) gagging and praying I could make it home before I lost all
my stomach contents.
29.
I’m a super nerd who enjoys long days of
creating excel workbooks with crazy formulas and SQL queries…if you don’t know
what both of those are your life is incomplete
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