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Friday, November 22, 2013

This One's For Brad

So I moved about 2 ½ years ago which cut my commute down (1 way) from 1 hour to about 30 minutes.  That is my commute until those dumb Cal State Fullerton kids are in school.

They don’t quite understand how to merge so that out of the 4 lanes there are on the freeway, 3.5 of those lanes are people trying to merge over to get off the freeway.  SO MUCH TRAFFIC.  I am pretty sure I look forward to when school’s out more than they do.
Add this annoyance to the fact that I HATE driving to a point where I am nearly always anxious, nervous and overwhelmed while driving (I know, I’m broken.  Deep down inside I know I’m going to die in some horrible car accident).  So I am not typically a “happy” driver.
At all.
But I would say I am a happier driver than my husband.
Anyway, so here I am one day and I’m driving, I’m feeling anxious (because I’m behind a wheel), and I’m feeling angry (because Fullerton kids can’t drive), and then some jerk face honks at me for no reason!
I’m used to getting honked at by creeping guys who then stare at me and think winking or licking their lips at me is SOOO attractive.
I’m used to get honked at by jerks on the road who have far too much road rage against a tiny little redhead who refuses to cut other people off and be rude (if you don’t like it YOU be the rude one to go cut them off…don’t honk at me when I won’t do it).
I’m not used to being honked at by somebody who is trying to get my attention because they know me.
So when I turn I expect to see a pervert or a jerk in the little truck next to me.  Instead I see a normal looking kind of dude waving at me.  I wave back (not because I know him, but because he’s waving and the polite thing to do is wave back). It takes my brain about 20 seconds (that’s a lot longer than it sounds) to process the fact that it actually IS somebody I know.
But by then I realize the cars in front of me have moved and I don’t want to be like those idiot Fullerton kids so I move up and can no longer see my friend in his truck next to me.  I keep hoping and waiting for our cars to once again be side by side so I can give him a proper wave and smile, but it doesn’t happen.  And since he is one of those lame face Fullerton kids he eventually gets off the freeway a few exists before me and the moment is over.
And as he tells the story…I practically flipped him off and yelled obscenities at him as I sped off…then I turned back around and ran him over with my car 10 times.  Did I get that right Brad?
But since that day…every Tuesday and Thursday I drive through the massive Cal State Fullerton traffic and hope for a glimpse of that little truck… because Brad and I are now freeway friends (which originally said freeway lovers, but that’s just inappropriate).

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