I Used To Want To Be A Teacher

Typically as I blog I imagine myself curled up with a blanket hunched (yes hunched, I have HORRIBLE posture) over a laptop with nothing but the sound of the keys as my fingers flail about haphazardly.    Maybe it’s a combination of watching Doogie Howzer and Sex in the City when I was home sick in High School.

I find myself at moments during the day mentally laying out what my next blog might contain.  Most of those never actually make it here because between church, friends, family and work this is not my top priority.

But today one of those thoughts came to mind as I left a conversation at work.  A conversation that just 6 months ago would have consisted of words that sound familiar but don’t actually mean anything to me.  A conversation that a year ago would have sounded like a completely foreign language.  I found myself thinking – HOW do I know THAT?  How am I at a mere (nearly) 30 years old, having no technical training or education, having conversations with developers and system gurus and understanding what they are saying?  HOW, with a Liberal Studies degree and a goal of teaching, did I end up here?  I image my life in parallel as a teacher (my goal) and a product analyst (my actual job) and I do NOT see a connection.

It is a series of non-eventful events that got me here.  This is not where I would have ever imagined ending up.  But man oh man do I love it.  My work here energizes me (most of the time).  It is difficult and forces me to dig deep and learn things I probably have no interest in learning.  It is long hours of research and fixing problems.  It is a perfect fit for me.

So even though I don’t know how I ended up here I am so very glad I did.  I get to use passions and skills I didn’t even know I had and now couldn’t imagine a job that didn’t let me do that.

And with that, I end this very boring blog that was written purely because I just really like my job and felt like expressing that sentiment.

Toast Of The Wellingtons

So on Wednesday my dear husband turns 32.  If I don’t think too hard about it…I feel like I’ve known him for such a small amount of time of those 32 years.  If I think about it a little harder, I realize I’ve known him for 10 years.  If I think even harder I realize that we have friends that were not even teenagers yet when I met Justin (THANKS FOR MAKING ME FEEL OLD TOMMY!)

All that is not really relevant though.  Really all I wanted to tell you about was our night out celebrating the studly man I’m married to.  I told Justin we should go out with the Welbaums for his birthday.  And he’d never say no to time spent with his favorite person in life (it’s not me in case you were wondering –I’ve grown to accept that).  His one request for the night, he wanted to eat Beef Wellington.

When I told his favorite person this (if you don’t know, that is Sam), the comment was “I’ve never heard of anyone ‘really wanting to try beef wellington’ before”.  True Sam, so very true.  But we watch Hell’s Kitchen – because it’s fun to watch somebody yell at a bunch of idiots and throw things around a kitchen.  And in Hell’s Kitchen they make beef wellington.  And Justin always looks at the wellington and says “that looks good”. 

So the hunt began.  I found it surprisingly difficult to find a place that makes it.  I found it impossible to actually find a place that had it on the menu.  But alas, I discovered that if you are looking for a beef wellington, you are looking for a British Pub.  So a British Pub I found.  When we arrived the location was questionable at best.  You know the fancy “blue tarp” on the roof and curtains inside so dusty that when Tiffany touched them it rained dead skin and pollen (I think that’s what dust is made of).

But on the menu – beef wellington.

There were “safe” things on the menu, but since I was at a British Pub for the first time I figured why not go all out!  The boys ordered the wellingtons and Tiff and I ordered some other meat dishes with pastry.

The food arrived.  There was so…much...gravy on everything.  My food was delicious until about half way through when I stopped tasting the food and just tasted gravy.  Tiffany was a champ that managed to eat her food after carefully scraping the dragon gravy from hers (it was made with Whiskey that I am pretty sure was not cooked out at all and burned your insides something fierce).

The boys seemed to enjoy theirs and even started off the meal with a “toast of the wellingtons” (I stole this picture from Tiffany)

After dinner we needed something deliciously sweet and Tiffany began the hunt.  Her only job was to find a place with brownies and she knew where we would go.  We headed to Seal Beach to this bakery that has SO MANY BROWNIES.  Justin ended up with 2 brownies and a chocolate chip cookie stuffed with peanut butter fudge and topped with chocolate fudge. 

We walked to the pier, enjoyed our goodies, and had a merry ol’ time. 

I’m awfully found of my husband’s best friend and best friend-in-law.  Thanks for a fun night guys!

Time For A New Heating Pad

I have done a horrible job keeping people informed on what’s going on with the Davis Klan.  As I was typing that I read “Davis Kah-n” and then thought Donkey Kong and suddenly feel the urge to play some old school Donkey Kong.

Anyway, I have not been good at keeping the people the care and read informed.  I just have lost my urge to blog.  I’ve been overwhelmed by how behind I am and it makes blogging less enjoyable.  And I primarily do this to be a brain dump of everything going on so I can look back later and be like “oh yeah!”

Maybe I’ll get better at posting.  Maybe not.  But at a minimum I should let you all know where things are with Growing Asian Babies part 2 or GAB for short.  I totally just spent 3 minutes trying to think of a fun acronym and GAB is all you got…I’m sorry I have failed you.  By my next blog maybe I’ll come up with a better name.  Or just forget that I made up a lame acronym…that is far more likely.

SOOO as I was saying – or not saying and just rambling and getting easily distracted – things are moving with my next surrogacy!

Tonight Justin will stick a medium sized needle into my rump…hopefully his months of practice from a year ago will kick in and it will go well.  I have Dr. L again (I actually requested that whatever Intended Parents (IP) I match with I wanted to work with Dr. L).  The medications are pretty much the same except no progesterone suppositories, instead injections twice a day instead of once a day.  Sad Day.   But in the end Dr. L says the results are better this way and it will be worth it to help those babies stick and grow!  I'll need a new heating pad to warm my rear end to reduce the pain (1 for home, 1 for work).

The schedule is below if you want to see the details and you can go here to see what all the drugs are if you are interested.

The summary is:

·         March 5^th I’ll go in for an ultrasound to check the “triple lining”…in other words my uterus is ready to catch some babies

·         March 12^th I’ll have 2 embryos transferred via IVF.  I’m not sure the gender yet.

·         March 14^th I’ll start my 10 day countdown with blogs about all the random crap I’m thinking about or doing in those 10 days (it helps me not stress)

·         March 24^th I’ll have a blood test done to see if I’m pregnant

For those of you that are new to my blog, or new to me (HI! I’m Rachael, nice to meet you). During my last surrogacy there was some drama.  Drama from people who didn’t understand what I was doing.  And for that reason I’ve decided that at the bottom of each Surrogacy Blog I will provide a little disclaimer.

DISCLAIMER aka THINGS YOU SHOULD KNOW

Click here for my Surrogacy FAQ.  As always PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE contact Justin or I if you have questions or concerns.  We are open and willing to share everything.

Sister Surrogate

I’m now an “experienced” surrogate.  That feels odd to me.  I still feel like I’m slightly stumbling my way through all of this.  Maybe I should have paid more attention the first time.  It is hard to focus on all the random…seemingly mundane things that are involved in the surrogacy process when all you are really looking at is the excitement of what is to come.

Sign this form, fax this here, call this person VS soon I might be pregnant, soon I’ll find out if I’m having 1 or 2 babies, soon I’ll be giving this baby back to it’s mommy and daddy.

The 2^nd half is FAR more exciting.

I remember enough to feel comfortable with the terms and a general idea of what is coming.  But I also know enough to worry more about things that I didn’t even think about before (since I didn’t know it was a thing).

 Like the fact the injections gave me SEVERE nausea…I lost SO MUCH weight that first trimester.

OR

What if there are placenta problems again? That was painful.

All that said, I learned a new term this time around.  Sister Surrogate.

I almost had a Sister Surrogate the first time I did this (without knowing it – or what that term was).  This time around I found out after agreeing to work with these new IP (Intended Parents) that I would have a Sister Surrogate.

And my “Sister” is an experienced Sister Surrogate.

So what is it?  The IP have selected 2 surrogates to carry their babies at the same time.  They are hoping for 4 babies…all…at…once (I told you in my last blog they wanted a lot of kids).  HOLY MOLY!

I think this is the part that makes this surrogacy feel slightly uncomfortable.  What if they like her more? What if she emails them more?  What if she sends them more pictures?

I think women (as a generalization) are uncomfortable (let’s be honest, HATE) being compared to other women.  We do it to ourselves constantly and assume others are doing it too.  I feel like this is a forced comparison situation.  How could you not have 2 of something and not compare them?!  I have to apples, one tastes better.  I have 2 shoes, one definitely feels better on my left foot.  I have 2 sisters (I don’t, but if I did) there is probably 1 I like better.

I KNOW it’ll probably come down to a situation that is more like how you feel about your children.  I love them all tremendously, but in different ways.  Some days I like some of them more than others.  Other days the one I liked yesterday is not the one I like today.  So if that situation is OK it should be ok with my Sister Surrogate too.  BUT that doesn’t help the fact that it still feels a little uncomfortable.  I think it would be just as uncomfortable if I was the 2^nd surrogate for a family that had a surrogate before.

This doesn’t make me feel any less excited for the end goal – providing a healthy – super adorable – baby (or babies) to a family that wants them so badly.  That is awesome.  That is why we do this.  That is why we go through all the sickness, pain, and discomfort that next year will bring.  I wouldn’t be so bold to say that God has called me to surrogacy, that doesn’t seem right.  But I am so bold to say that doing this gives me a way to show them God’s love.  That the reason I am willing to do all of this to myself is because God has commanded me to love others and this is a way I can do that. This is a way for me to minister and serve a family who needs to see God’s love.  THIS IS NOT THE WAY EVERYONE SHOULD DO THAT!  I just want to make that clear.  Just like donating $1,000,000,000 to charity is not the way everyone should do it.  Or just like fostering 5 kids isn’t for everyone.

So let’s begin my prayer requests:

• That the next few weeks as we deal with “Paperwork” goes smoothly and I it will not be a struggle to get everything in the contract I want to ensure this baby (or babies) will be protected
• That the baby (babies) will be healthy from day 1 (or day 6-ish technically since they are already about 6 days old)
• That every time I interact with my IP they see Jesus in me

 

A Whole New Set Of Emotions

Let’s start with the drama!  Imagine with me… days after delivering a beautiful baby girl for a family that was unable to have their own…you get a phone call to meet a new family “just in case you decide to do it again”.

I agreed, why not? A free meal at Cheesecake Factory and meeting some new IP (intended parents) in the even Justin and I decided to embark on this surrogacy journey again.

The meeting went well; they asked me to get pregnant in 2 months. Um. No.  I told them I wasn’t ready to commit to anything yet.  “We’ll See” is where I left it.

Once I got my medical clearance I reached out to this couple.  I didn’t hear anything back.

In the meantime the agency (who I love – do you want to be a surrogate? Go find Coastal Surrogacy!) called me to meet a new family.

Admittedly, meeting this family did not leave me heartbroken like when meeting my first IP.  I think that is because this family does have children.  She just can’t have anymore.  She is YOUNG.  She is my age.  And her body just can’t do it again.  But she longs for a large family.  She loves being a mommy and wants more kids to add to her bunch (a lot more kids I might add).  After talking it over with Justin we decided to proceed.

After singing my “agreement” with them, I got a message from the IP I met several months earlier… a day too late.  There was some not-so-happy emails about our choice to go with different IP which was awkward.  But in the end, I believe it was the right choice.

So here I am, working on “Legal” (getting a contract signed) and I feel weird.  I feel different.

I am still excited, but not in the same way.  There is a difference between helping somebody who has tried and failed several times to have their own baby and somebody who already has a baby but can’t have any more.

On one hand, I was almost overwhelmed and broken for my first IP.  Hearing her story hurt my heart in such a unique way and all I wanted to do was carry her baby so she could hold that little life that she so deeply desired.

And now I have this “I get it” feeling.  I loved my first baby, but growing my family was just as incredible.  Watching how the brother and sister relationships grow.  Watching how those babies, coming from the same parents, are so unique.  I love watching my children’s uniqueness shine through – just a picture of how God creates each of us to be different to fulfill our singular goal.  So I get it.  For some, one is enough.  One wasn’t enough for me.  And it isn’t enough for this family.

There is more to this story, but this is enough for today. 

Next week (or day or something) on Rachael’s blog: Sister Surrogates…Say What?!

That One Time...With The Things

There have been things happening.  All sorts of things.

Exciting Things!

Sad Things

Disgusting Things

Painful Things

Funny Things

My blog updating has become rare.  I assume by now most of my “followers” have stopped really paying attention.  And that is ok (makes me a little sad, but I’ll get over it).

In the last few months there have been holidays and birthdays.  There have been vacations and work.

So so so much work.

There have been illnesses.

So so much illness…seriously: Lice (x2), Pin Worm, Pink Eye, Ear Infections, some random illness that has caused fevers in my kids for several days at a time, colds, head to toe hives, and something else I am likely missing.  I have somehow managed to avoid most of it (minus the constant nausea from a new medication).

But as some new exiting things are new and fresh I have felt the need to express it.  And in looking at my poor neglected blog realizing SO MANY THINGS I’VE MISSED?!

·         HoliDavis (How did not post?!)

·         Taylor’s 8^th Birthday (and party)

·         A Promotion at work

·         Signing with new iP (intended parents) for another surrogacy

I’m not even going to try and catch up.  And that is hard.  But at this point the fun details have probably buried themselves deep in my aging/exhausted/mother brain and nobody wants to dig around in there.  You never know what you’ll get.  So that list is all you’ll get and a “yeah, I forgot to blog about it”.

Hopefully Taylor will forgive me someday when’s she 70 and realizes her mother had a blog (by then I assume a blog will be the current generations version of a note written with a quill, sealed with wax, and sent via horseback a town over).  And then she realized her mother forgot and then her mother decided to just not blog about her celebrations of being alive for 8 years.  Maybe.

What I will tell you is that in the very near future I will update you on Surrogacy Round 2 (also known as SR2…not really, but it makes it sound more like a movie and I was born to be star).

So Sayith Tay, Jay, and Eli #7

Who has a birthday coming up?

Taylor: Me

Jordan: Taylor

Elijah: Mine

Who would you want for your birthday?

Taylor: Elsa dress

Jordan: I want a hello kitty robot

Elijah: A train that flies.  A remote control train.

What do you want to get Taylor for her birthday?

Taylor: (N/A)

Jordan: Elsa doll

Elijah: A barbie doll that has music.

Who do you think Taylor wants for her birthday?

Taylor: (N/A)

Jordan: A Elsa doll

Elijah: A choo train that flies with a tramote (remote).

What kind of birthday party should Taylor have?

Taylor: Elsa and Ana

Jordan: A princess party

Elijah: With a cupcake and candy.  And me candy too.

What kind of birthday cake should Taylor have?

Taylor: Elsa cake - ice and blueberry flavor

Jordan: Elsa cake - rainbow one

Elijah: A singing barbie doll cake - vanilla.