Sorry I have sort of been MIA. I’m not really in much of a mood to be wordless (wordless Wednesday is not for me) nor do I feel much like actually blogging today. So I’m making myself share something I don’t really want to.
I had a conversation with a friend about a week ago about how I do not ask for help easily. I’d prefer to suffer through things alone. Unless something cannot be done without help or if I don’t get help there could be impact on my kids or Justin I’m a “handle it myself” gal.
So today I’m asking for your prayers on something I find rather petty actually. You may all read this and think…really? She’s bothering wasting my time with that?! If that’s now how you feel, that’s how I feel about even mentioning it, but in my attempt to ask for “help” in the form of prayers I figure why not try.
I know you wont judge me, because for the 5 millionth time (and more to come) I can tell you I have the best friends in the world.
There are several things going on right now financially for us. Things that don’t justify taking money out of our emergency fund like:
- A broken Cell Phone
- Dentist Appointments
- A broken Steamer
- Minor car issues
There are a few more, but you get the point. They are not life threatening and not getting these things fixed or replaced doesn’t harm the “4 Walls” (Shelter, Food, Utilities, Transportation) so they just get pushed aside.
In total we would need about $600 to replace/fix everything and from previous blogs of mine you know in our normal life that won’t happen any time soon unless by some divine intervention.
My prayer if for peace and not for money to come falling into our laps – in God’s timing we will get the money to fix/replace things. I try to focus daily on all the blessings in our life, but over the last few weeks the pile of frustrations has been piling up.
Frustrations that I cannot do anything about simply because we can’t afford it.
That last sentence has been a common theme in our house since Justin and I were married and sometimes it’s just exhausting.
My struggle right now is that I want to see the light at the end of the tunnel and although I know its there, it’s still too far out to get the glimpse.
This is living in Faith. I don’t mind living in Faith - it gives me more opportunity to notice things from God that I might otherwise overlook.
I keep having conversations with myself/God about “good” things I want to “do” like
…adopt another kid (or maybe 2 –if I can convince Justin it’s a good idea)
…MOVE out of the place we are now where my kids are surrounded by teasing and disrespect to the point they can’t play outside unless no one else is around (Like when Jordan walked to the car and some much older kid called her a name and kicked a soccer ball as hard as he could at her 3 year old legs knocking her to the ground and when you confront that kids parents they yell at you about minding your own business and how you have no right to say anything to their kid)
…stop paying debt so we can actually invest in the future of our kids, friends, and family
Again…pretty much all petty and I know that. Just asking for you all to pray that I’ll stop dwelling on the things I can’t do anything about right now and remember that someday it will be taken care of.
Thank you friends – the best friends in the world that is.