At the time, Justin was watching one of our friend's kids about once a week (which was a huge help). We started the conversation with something like this.
You know how Matt and Kim bring Sophie to our house? We play with her for awhile, take care of her, love her, and then she goes back home with her mom and dad. Sophie belongs to Matt and Kim, not us. Just like the baby they will be putting in my tummy. The baby was made by [Mom's Name] and [Dad's Name], but [Mom's Name]'s tummy doesn't work well so she can't hold her own baby there. So we are going to put the baby in my tummy and let it grow and take care of it and love it. Then when it is born, she'll go home with her mommy and daddy.
In a nutshell, that explains it. They know it isn't our baby (we aren't giving up their brother/sister).
Sometime around my 3rd surrogacy Eli was watching some TLC show where this family had a billion babies. I think like 4-6 of them, plus 1-2 older ones. He decided he wanted to have that many babies. He became temporarily obsessed with how many babies he wanted to have. So one day he was looking at my preggo belly and asked, "Mom, next time you have a baby, can it be you and daddy's baby so we can bring him home? Maybe you can have 4 (or maybe it was 6 - I don't remember) at the same time and I can help take care of them."
My response, "No way buddy! Not only is it physically impossible for us, I'm done with babies. But when you grow up and get married you can have as many as you want. Just make sure your wife knows how many you want before you get married because you'll have to agree."
He was still a little bummed, which is what prompted the adoption journey conversations. After all, we didn't want a baby, but we weren't against having another kid.
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