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Wednesday, January 23, 2013

What the Voice in My Head Thinks About Lunch

Sometimes while making myself a salad I think of the comedian Brian Regan.  Since this post will make no sense unless you have heard his snow cone joke you must now click here and watch it before returning to this blog post.

Do it.


It’ll be worth your time.

Now that you have enjoyed that awesomeness I will let you in on the little conversation that happens in my head as I’m prepping a salad.

::chops cucumber:: Mmm, cucumber, my favorite veggie.
::chops carrots:: oh, but carrots are delicious too, also a favorite
::chops celery:: what vitamins are in celery anyway?  I mean beside the vitamin of delicious.
::cuts lettuce:: I wish I could put every kind of lettuce in this salad.  I like lettuce.  It’s another favorite.
::tosses in tomatoes:: I hate sour tomatoes as much as I LOVE delicious ones.  Mmm tomatoes are veggie candy.
::adds shredded cheese:: less is most definitely not more, pile it on.
::cuts up salami:: This is my favorite meet, seriously.  I could eat this whole thing right now or make this salad even more awesome
::adds croutons:: can you eat croutons by themselves? I mean they are pretty much like chips right?
::tosses salad with buffalo ranch:: I wonder if Sam would like buffalo ranch since it is more buffalo then it is ranch.
::takes bite of salad:: Something healthy should not taste this good.  I should blog about all the weird things I just thought while making this salad…

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