So let’s get the other stuff out of the way first:
1. So Sayith
Tay and Jay may come later this week…or not. Sorry.
2. The exciting weekend of things will also come later this week (this I am slightly more sure of).
Today I’d rather have a little pity party of a blog. Sorry friends. You are more then welcome to stop reading now. No offense will be taken.
I remember for awhile I felt like my blogs were all doom and gloom. Then I turned a corner (or just made an effort to not blog when in a bad mood). Now it seems you’ll get 2 whiney blogs in a matter of a week.
Again Sorry – and feel free to stop reading. You’ve been warned. I typically don’t post these ones on facebook either (where most of my traffic originates) since I want to vent and if people read its fine, but I’m not searching for attention…if that makes sense.
Now to why I’m writing.
I think a lot of this is piggy backing on this constant nausea I’ve had for nearly 2 weeks now. I wake up and feel like I’m going to hurl, then feel fine for awhile, then sick, then fine, then I have a headache, then sick and so on. It’s been rather annoying. And like the title of this blog there is NO BUN IN THE OVEN.
Justin took care of that nearly 2 years ago so there better not be…
Maybe it’s the lack of sleep in combination with my crazy flux of sick feelings that is making more sensitive aka more whiney then usual. For whatever reason, it’s happening.
I’ve also been thinking about something a friend said to me about a year ago. There is nothing in particular that made me think this so please don’t try to read into it anything more then my recent Eeyore personality dwelling on all things depressing.
She and her husband had been going through a lot of crap and as she sat with me venting her little heart out she said “I’m tired of protecting him…I love him and don’t want anyone to see him in a negative light so I don’t tell anyone what happens when they aren’t looking”. Essentially she loved him so much she was scared of anyone seeing him in a negative light. So no matter what was going on in their home, nobody knew unless it ended with a smile.
She was depressed and defeated but left the house with smile in the morning to hide the sin and hurt in her home that he was causing.
How far do people go to “protect” the ones we love? If we keep protecting them will they ever move through it? I mean if she had told his friends or family could they not have intervened and tried to help him through it? Is maybe exactly what he needed an embarrassing moment with somebody else to realize how ridiculous he was being?
Or is it our job to suffer the burden? Is it our role as family to push through the tough situations alone for sake of holding up the “image” of each other? Where is the line between slanderous gossip and talking to somebody for help?
So that’s what’s been going through my mind. And today I end with a quote I saw on a lumber yard’s sign in front…
“There’s no point in being pessimistic…it won’t help anyway”